Blessing or Cursed

I don't understand it, you live life correctly...don't break rules, respect your elders and parents just the same, develop friendships and yet nothing is right.
I read these blogs of celebrities saying that now that they're out of the show biz buisness they're much happier, that it's easier. Please, show me easier. I feel like a puppet on a string, nothing I do can ever be enough. I have 5 sisters and 3 brothers, I am 2nd slash 3rd oldest (I share my position with my twin) and I am the only one anyone ever goes to for help. I don't have a college degree, I got hurt during my time spent in the military so I can't utilize that, I have a job that just barely pays the bills and I don't have any special talents. Why me? I don't have a lot of money and I want to desperately go back to school.
I go to see broadway shows every chance I can (2-3 times a year) the expense is worth it, I play sports, I go to showtune night at the "boys" bar in the city when I'm off of work and I box. I do have street smarts and common sense, that I know because I wouldn't be where I am today without them...some people think because you're a girl you're brainless, well I have taught many a men that not only am I not brainless but I have a heck of a lot more brains than them (most of the time)
My brain has a great capacity for useless information, but weird as it sounds I always seem to learn something that I can use in the future.
So, with all of this why of all the siblings to choose from am I the only one anyone calls upon. I wish I could have the pulls of a celebrity and help my family in ways I cannot now...maybe then when I do help it would enough rather than helping and exceeding my expectations and still feeling as though I've failed. I help my brother with all of his papers for college -when in reality I wish it was me in school...but it's a known assumption in my family that I'll get to go to school eventually, meanwhile help him. I help all my sisters with a bit of cash now and then when I really shouldn't be because I don't have it, though I always seem to get by to help them. I help my Mom with everything from lecturing my younger siblings for her to becoming her plumber, carpenter, mover, builder, cleaner, mechanic, and whatever else she can't do and calls upon me to do - but why am I Elphaba or feeling like her, no matter what I do it's not good enough or just plain BAD, not what they meant for or I didn't do enough to get it right. I'm exhausted and cannot yeild. I love my family and want to do all I can but I sometimes feel they've taken all I once had.
Celebrities yes, have to deal with a great deal of bull but look at what they can do - they can influence without breaking a sweat, they can help anyone with a snap of a finger, and they can disappear to a hide-a-way when it's gotten to be enough and quit their job all-together.
I cannot disappear, I have bills that never seem to end...I cannot help even half the people I'd like because the resources aren't there, I'm trying to influence my younger siblings still living at home and that seems like a lost cause - to them I'm the bit@h of the family I lost what is cool and they want nothing to do with my ideas and as many times a day my Mom calls and says "could you" I wish I could crawl into a cave and never come out I fulfill that could you every time. Why? Why should I, no one else does...
Why can't I say no and figure out my life, fix me, help me and why can't someone else do the dirty work and even lend me a helping hand.